In the beginning

I know there are some of you out there that remember high school as an awkward phase. I know I do. I had alot of friends and even a boyfriend or two, but I did not know myself. This was a time of insecurity and searching to find myself and my place in the world. I was always a chubby girl, not fat, but not as skinny as my friends. I had the same crushes as other girls my age, but was scared to be rejected if I let the guy know my feelings. I lived in a small town, where everyone had small town minds. My idea of the big city was going to the mall! And that was a 45 minute drive. We went to ballgames, hung out at the arcade and cruised the local shopping center. Because of the boredom of life, alot of people drank. I don't think I have ever seen so much underage drinking and sexual activity. I was not a saint, but I was good girl. I think that when you have nothing to do and you are a teenager, that is asking for trouble! I swore that I would leave that small town and move where people wanted more than to get a house and start a family. When I graduated from high school it was bittersweet. My friends got married and had babies. Right after high school! I did not want that for me. Sadly, I never thought about college because none of friends ever thought about it. I got my first job and felt trapped by my mundane life. I was only 18, but felt much older. I swore I would not have the life my parents had. I wanted to discover life outside of my town, to find myself and my destiny.